Today marks the eleven month anniversary of the day I started this ridiculous project. In that time I have walked 1,119.57 miles on the treadmill while taking 2,180,619 steps, watching 617 episodes and 133 stories of Doctor Who, and losing 62.38 pounds in weight. That's a little over two pounds since last month, which on the face of it doesn't seem that great. Part of it is because I got sick earlier in the month, so between that plus my colonoscopy two days ago I missed more days on the treadmill this month than in the entire first ten months combined. My weight spiked up about three pounds, so I have actually lost more like eight pounds this month -- it's just that I lost three of those pounds twice, which was a little counter-productive. Ah, well.The simple fact is that my moving average is lower today than it ever has been since I started this progress, and while the graph is certainly filled with ups and downs the downs continue to outnumber the ups, and I am happy. I keep reminding myself that when I started this project my only stated goal was to feel better, and I undeniably feel significantly better today than I did eleven months ago. Twenty pounds ago I thought I had hit my leveling out point, and yet here I am. This has been an amazing transformation for me, and I still have several months to go before I hit the end of Doctor Who. Of course, then there are the spinoffs...

So anyway, I watched the first half of Peri's first story as a companion. She arrived in a bikini. Hubba hubba. Let's talk about that. 

Planet of Fire - Parts 1 & 2

(TARDIS Data Core recap)

Look, I'm not saying that Nicola Bryant was cast in the role of Peri for anything besides her acting ability. I am sure she nailed the screaming and the running in her audition. But I am pretty sure the camera setup for this scene was not accidental...

The plot of the story involves Kamelion...remember him? He has been a robotic companion to the Doctor for the past seven stories, except for the part where he completely disappeared without mention for that entire time... so anyway, Kamelion freaks the heck out and causes the TARDIS to materialize on the island of Lanzarote in the Canary Islands. Hence the whole "pretty young woman in a bikini" thing. Kamelion is tracing a signal from an alien platinum dildo, which is discovered by Peri's father-in-law and subsequently stolen by Peri in order to fund a trip to Morocco. I wish I could make that make more sense. Peri attempts to swim to shore from her father-in-law's boat, but despite her obvious buoyancy she nearly drowns before Turlough rescues her and brings her back to the TARDIS to recuperate. It is then that he sees the alien platinum dildo in her bag.

Turlough gets visibly excited when he finds the alien platinum dildo

It turns out that the signal is from a device that comes from Turlough's home planet, and possibly from his father. Yes, that is Turlough's father's alien platinum dildo.

It also turns out that Kamelion is under the control of the Master, who sends everyone off to the planet Sarn because that is where the alien platinum dildo is signaling to. Upon arrival there is much running around, there are natives on the planet squabbling over whether or not to believe in their volcano god, said volcano is about to erupt, and the Doctor is forced to watch as a bunch of innocent bystanders are about to be sacrificed to the fire.

Alien platinum dildo.  (I just had to type that one more time, sorry. Not sorry.)

All dildo jokes aside, and also aside from Peri's obvious assets, this is actually a good story. I am not sold on having an American companion, and Peri's a bit more on the scream-y side (I prefer the companions to be more like Barbara Wright, Goddess). But the story plays nicely with the complexities of Turlough's character. He started out as a villain and potential assassin, and even once he shed the influence of the Black Guardian he has remained much more shady and unreliable than the normal companion. Here, he is again working at cross-purposes to the Doctor while being completely freaked out about what is going on. It is also nice to see the writers finally deal with Kamelion, and to use him effectively. I am looking forward to tomorrow's conclusion.

STATS:

Doctor(s): Fifth
Companion(s): Turlough, Peri
Episode(s): Planet of Fire - Parts 1 & 2
Steps Walked: 7,685 today, 2,180,619 total
Distance Walked: 4.40 miles today, 1,119.57 miles total
Weight: 244.92 lbs (five day moving average), net change -62.38 lbs