One fat geek's SUCCESSFUL attempt to regenerate into a not-so-fat geek by watching the entirety of Doctor Who while walking on a treadmill

Into the Woods, and Who Can Tell What's Waiting on the Journey?

Jul 07 2018
Into the Woods, and Who Can Tell What's Waiting on the Journey?

Tyger Tyger, burning bright,
In the forests of the night,
What immortal hand or eye,
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?

William Blake's The Tyger is so much more entertaining than today's episode of Doctor Who. So let's talk about that.

In the Forest of the Night

(TARDIS Data Core recap)

You know when this story doesn't take place? At night. Like, not ever. It begins in the morning, after forests have sprung up fully-grown overnight, but at no point does any moment of the story take place at night. And these forests have appeared globally, covering the entire Earth. Based on the shots from space, the forest are even covering the oceans, because of course they are. That's exactly how forests work. Also: they appeared overnight in London, where apparently nobody heard or noticed them growing until opening their front doors in the morning, and although there is a nod to the rest of the world in news reports there is no description of other regions where the forst must have appeared right in the middle of the day. Also also: when, at the end when the forests disappear after the Doctor doesn't do anything, none of the existing buildings or streets or anything are damaged. Because, of course.

As I said with Kill the Moon, this has never been a hard science fiction series. There is all kinds of WhateverTechnology that gets used with no direct relationship to actual physics, but at least the writers usually put some lipstick on the pig and sell it as making sense in context. This story, however, makes no sense in any context. The titular forests spring up overnight because there is going to be a giant solar flare. When the flare hits the Earth, the new forests absorb the energy from the sun's fury (actual, literal global flames enveloping the Earth), and then everything goes back to normal.

Oh, and a teenage runaway is wished back into existence or something, because that's a plot thread as well.

It's just bad. Not quite "the moon is a giant galactic dragon egg" bad, but the storytelling style does not fit the series in any recognizable way. I hate it. I hate it with all the fire of a giant solar flare, only I don't have a semi-sentient global forest to absorb the blow. 

But hey, at least this episode doesn't dig up the corpse of one of the most beloved characters in the show's history and then parade it around disgracefully like a silver puppet. No, that won't happen until the day after tomorrow.

STATS:

Doctor(s): Twelfth
Companion(s): Clara Oswald, Danny Pink
Episode(s): In the Forest of the Night
Steps Walked: 7,549 today, 3,402,959 total
Distance Walked: 4.06 miles today, 1,778.29 miles total
Push-ups Completed: 0 today, 6,579 total
Sit-ups Completed: 0 today, 929 total
Weight: 248.32 lbs (five day moving average), net change -58.98 lbs


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